A Dog Named "Sex"

A Dog Named Sex

Everybody I know who has a dog 

Usually calls him "Rover" or "Boy."

I call mine "Sex." Now, Sex has been

Very embarrassing to me. 

When I went to the City Hall to renew

His dog license, I told the clerk that I

Would like a license for Sex. He said,

"I'd like to have one too." Then I said,

"You don't understand. I've had Sex

Since I was nine years old." He said,

"You must have been quite a kid!" 

When I got married and went on my

Honeymoon, I took the dog with me.

I told the hotel clerk that I wanted a

Room for my wife and me, and a special

Room for Sex. He said, "Every room in

The place is for sex." I said, "You don't

Understand. Sex keeps me awake at

Night." The clerk said, "Me too." 

One day I entered Sex in a contest,

But before the competition began, the

Dog ran away. Another contestant

Asked me why I was just looking around.

I told him I had planned to have Sex in the

Contest. He told me that I should have

Sold tickets. "But you don't understand,"

I said, "I had hoped to have Sex on T.V."

He called me a show-off. 

When my wife and I separated, we went

To court to fight for custody of the dog.

I said, "Your Honor, I had Sex before I

Was married." The judge said, "Me too."

Then I told him that after I was married,

Sex left me. He said, "Me too." 

Last night Sex ran off again. I spent

Hours looking around town for him. A

Cop came over to me and asked, "What

Are you doing in the alley at 4 o'clock in

The morning?" I said, "I'm looking for Sex." 

My case comes up Friday.